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From Turmoil to Tranquility Book Cover

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

A must-read for anyone who has been told to "let go" or "get over it" but doesn't know how.  -- Brian Gerrard, Ph.D, Assoc. Prof., Counseling Psychology , University of San Francisco

 

From Turmoil to Tranquility CDs

 

 

 

 

 

Download the Turmoil to Tranquility book (only $12) or CDs (only $19.95)

 immediately, Get Rid of Your Fear of Abandonment, Panic Attacks and Anxiety and Start Feeling Better NOW! 

 

SIGNS AND SYMPTOMS:  Do you get panic attacks and severe anxiety when you are afraid of being abandoned - afraid that someone you love might leave you? 

Do you get anxious when you are expecting someone to show up and you are afraid they will be late?

Do you start to hyperventilate, experience racing thoughts or anger when they actually are late? 

Do you have an overwhelming fear that a loved one is having an affair or is going to be killed? Or spend endless hours imagining every terrible possibility that you will lose your loved ones?

Do you feel that if you are not perfect, "they" will desert you? Are you willing to do almost anything to keep the ones you love from leaving you?

Do you strike out in anger if you feel someone is pulling away from you?

Have you ever stalked someone because you have to "find out" if they are seeing someone else?   Or spent hours trying to figure out how to get someone back?

Do you have a pattern of abusive relationships in which people actually do leave you in the end?

Fear of being abandoned is one of life's most life-debilitating fears, one that plagues millions of Americans.  This fear eats away at the core of your life, your feelings of self-worth and your relationships with others.  And it can be a repeated cycle.

 

Are you attracted to or love someone who is verbally, emotionally or physically abusive?

Fear of being abandoned creates severe anxiety and can cause you to cling to abusive relationships - verbally, emotionally or physically.    It can lead you to unconsciously attract and be attracted to people who will abandon you.  This is referred to as "repetition compulsion" in psychiatric circles, and refers to situations where you repeat your childhood trauma and the patterns you may have experienced in your family.  You can see it all around you when those who suffer from the fear of abandonment leave one dysfunctional relationship only to quickly find another, virtually identical one. Does this happen to you?

Did or do you often fall in love passionately and often instantaneously - even with people who turn out to be physically, verbally, or emotionally abusive?

Do you love someone whose characteristics you don't also respect?

Do you interpret jealousy as love?

Is passion and longing - even if you don't respect their character - honesty, loyalty, courage, maturity, hard work etc. - enough to make you want to stay with them? 

Do you admire the person you love?  Do other people you respect admire them as well?

Do you spend lots of your time worrying about whether or not your partner really loves you?

True, lasting love is Passion, Admiration and Respect - PAR for the course of love.  While it sometimes begins with passion, it waits until the character of the loved one is revealed - over time - before becoming vulnerable.  In other words, it waits until the other has proven through the course of living that he or she is safe to be with.

 

Velcro relationships, on the other hand - those in which the attraction is so instantaneous and powerful, it is virtually impossible to resist - are a dead giveaway that you have attracted and are attracted to a person that will trigger your childhood experiences of abandonment.  These relationships are usually characterized by an emotional roller-coaster of extreme drama, fear, and anxiety.

 

THE CAUSE:  Do you know why you suffer from so much anxiety, panic and fear of being abandoned?  Why you attract and are attracted to people who trigger your fear of being left?

 

This fear is not "irrational."  You are afraid of being abandoned because

  1. At some time - usually in the distant past and often as an infant, you experienced an event that you interpreted as abandonment and made you very afraid.   Because we are a culture of divorce, working parents, single mothers, and few extended families, this is very common.

  2. You may or may not "remember" the event because it may have occurred before you developed "verbal memory," the ability to put words to events to explain them.

  3. When the event occurred, the brain chemicals produced by anxiety synthesized into proteins and were stored in the emotional brain (amygdala)

  4. Now, whenever you encounter something that "reminds" you of that traumatic event, these proteins are "disturbed," and you experience the same feelings now that you did then - panic attacks, anxiety, fear, terror of being unloved or left alone.

My past relationship was an exact copy of my relationship with my mother.  He drank, she drank, he took pills, she took pills, he was out of control, she was out of control.  I felt frightened and vulnerable and in charge with them both.  It hit me, even though I wasn't even thinking about it, I mean, I wasn't trying to figure it out at the time.  I had been through the process of getting these feelings up and out a couple of weeks earlier, and suddenly I was  making very specific connections that had eluded me before.

 

Do you try to avoid these feelings by trying to control your partner?

The first line of defense for most people who fear abandonment is to try to control the environment, their partners, friends, family or children.  But this is one of the most exhausting and destructive responses - often resulting in the person really abandoning you - and sometime in stalking, harassment, even murder.  The sequence of feelings goes something like this:

  • That person is causing my fear

  • If they didn't do that, I wouldn't be having these panic attacks

  • Therefore, it is their fault that I feel this way

  • If I can get them to change their behavior, I won't be anxious

  • If I can control my environment better, I will be free from anxiety and panic

 

(If you would like a FREE, more detailed report on the healthy amygdala please enter your e-mail address below and download.) 

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Do you know WHY controlling your partner's behavior won't eliminate your anxiety, panic attacks or fear of abandonment, no matter what he or she does? 

 

Make no mistake about it, the feelings you are having are real - BUT - they are caused by the original experience and not the "trigger." 

  • The fear, panic attacks and anxiety that you are experiencing are not "caused" by your partner, they are only triggered by him or her

  • Fear, panic attacks and anxiety are caused by real physical entities, proteins stored in the emotional brain, that only you can get rid of.

  • Even if you could control your partner's behavior 24/7, someone else will trigger your feelings at another time - perhaps a parent, a friend or other acquaintance. 

  • Controlling your partner 24/7 is exhausting work - and will probably end up with your partner leaving anyway when they get sick and tired of your trying to control them.

  • You will unconsciously attract and be attracted to abusive relationships who will abandon you until you get rid of the underlying cause - this is referred to as "repetition compulsion" in psychological jargon.

THE CURE:  Did you know that the emotional brain, like other parts of the body self-corrects? 

So, as Dr. Phil says, how is all that control stuff working for you?  Probably not very well, which is why I am asking you to "stop doing the same thing over and over again expecting different results!"  You can get rid of your old emotional baggage, your fear of abandonment, panic and anxiety completely and NOW without medication - BUT 

  • Your body is engaged in a constant struggle (often with you!) to get rid of this protein and get healthy - and if you learn how to give up the struggle, you will begin to get well virtually overnight.

  • Your anxiety, life crises and abusive relationships are not "wrong" but are symptoms of previous fearful experiences.  When you get rid of the protein, you will also attract - and be attracted to -healthier relationships and life circumstances.

  • You must "do something different" when your anxiety starts to grow. 

  • You must learn what to do when the memory is in a "labile" state - i.e. as it is being triggered - not by trying to control it, but by LETTING GO! 

  • You must learn how to work WITH your body's self correcting mechanism instead of against it. 

  • You can do this with or without your partner's cooperation - AND - you don't need to actually remember the trauma that set the fear of abandonment in motion to get rid of it either.

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What a week this has been!  I have been releasing on a non-stop basis. I brought the tapes home and my husband has listened to them and is releasing also. This is what we have been looking for for a long time.  I also noticed that things that irritate me come up quicker than before, but instead of yelling at the person that supposedly "caused me to get angry", I quickly  feel it to the max, then release it.  My husband picked up the technique right away also.  In fact he said the release feels exactly like the big "O". Our home is much more peaceful, our relationship is improving every day. It was never a bad relationship, but now it is feeling like it did when we first fell in love. April 25th is our 21st wedding anniversary, I could not think of a better gift, than what we've received from this program. Thank you!!  A. B., Homemaker

 

When I realized that when people brought up my past relationship and it didn't push my buttons, I was tickled pink.  It was gone.  And when it finally hit me, I jumped around for joy.

 

I am more direct, clearer about who I am, more honest, less frightened of others.  I tell people what I feel.  I used to be the nice guy, in order to placate people.  I'm more honest now, more straightforward and more me.  I'm not afraid of other people, not afraid of what they will think.  I am comfortable just being me. W

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You CAN live a life you may now only dream of

  • You CAN have the family you always wanted

  • You CAN feel safe - AND - excitement in your relationships

  • You CAN be attracted to someone who will admire and protect you

  • You CAN get rid of the drama - but keep the passion

  • You CAN heal your childhood wounds - and live in harmony and joy

But to do so, you need only learn how your emotional brain works, how your body is trying to heal you, and how to let it - instead of fighting it.

 

THE PROGRAM:  From Turmoil to Tranquility

The Therapist Within philosophy is not about using tricks and will power to 'derail' your anxiety or fear. It is not about fighting your feelings or giving you one more thing to "do." It is not about keeping panic at bay by controlling other people or about covering up your anxiety with meds.  It does not assume that your anxiety, panic, fear, relationship choices and life crises are "wrong" but instead that they are signals - symptoms - that your body is trying to get rid of emotional memories, anxiety, fear and get healthy. It is not about suppressing those symptoms but rather about learning how to "plug into" and  trust yourself so that you can let go of the struggle - permanently and completely

 

This program will NOT help you "stuff and re-store" From Turmoil to Tranquility Book Cover

the proteins of your old memories.  It will NOT

  • Teach you another method to distract yourself

  • Tell you to think positively or fight your fear

  • Teach you how to cover up your feelings or push them away with medications or "tricks"

  • Provide vague "touchy-feely" formulas  such as "let go" and "follow your feelings." Instead it gives specific, detailed  instructions as to exactly HOW to get rid of anxiety, panic and need to control, and how to know WHEN to do so to get permanent relief

This program will show you how to get rid of the proteins of these old memories permanently and completely - and restore your emotions to full health.  It will:

From Turmoil to Tranquility CDs

  • Teach you how to know when your body is trying to get rid of old trauma, anxiety and fear

  • Give you very specific, detailed instructions how to let it

  • Help you stop being attracted to abusive relationships and end unhealthy patterns now

  • Provide you the skills you need to turn off your rational brain and turn on your feeling brain to create healthy, happy and joyful relationships

  • Demonstrate how to connect with your partner's real emotional needs, not just their words

  • Help you separate out truth from fiction regarding what your partner is saying and how to deal constructively with the truth

  • Show you how to turn your personal crises and trauma into a healing process

You are the expert in your own life.  While you can get guidance on where to look for answers, only your intuition and 'feelings' can lead you to the correct answer that fits you. The goal of these programs is to help you connect to your internal emotional guidance system so that you can get completely healthy, feel certain of who you are, where you are going, and are living life with clarity, purpose, peace and joy.

 

Download the From Turmoil To Tranquility book or CD's immediately, Eliminate Your Fear of Abandonment, Panic Attacks and Anxiety

and Start Feeling Better NOW!

 

To contact us:The Therapist Within Logo

info@TheTherapistWithin.com  

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